Fifty is Freedom!

In honor of my Moms 50th birthday on July 10, I had been planning to do a "50 things I love about my Mom" post... However my sister gave my mom a gift of a handmade 50 things scrapbook. Yup. Beat out again by my much-more-creative-than-me sister. So. Mine wont be nearly as good and there may be repeats of things my sister said in this blog, but these are some of the things I love and cherish about my mom.

1. She is absolutely beautiful. She keeps saying she looks like shes 50 and just laughs if people say she looks younger... so to appease her, I will say: shes rockin 50 by looking faaaantastic!!

2. She has a generous and caring heart.

3. She recognizes right from wrong and stands up for the right. Shes passionate about these things and is willing to fight for them.

4. She lets me wear her scrubs.

5. She is an amazing friend. One who people can depend on, are eager to talk to, trust to confide in, and genuinely love.

6. She is a loving daughter and sister, always calling her siblings and parents on their birthdays to sing to them. She checks in on her parents from time to time and loves spending time with her mom (aka my grandma).

7. She drives a big car and was always the hottest mama carpoolin!

8. She has been knocked down by so many of lifes grievances, yet she continues to stand up and trudge on... giving all the glory to the Lord. She truly inspires me.

9. She loves the Lord with all her heart and has instilled a desire to seek Him in both my sister and me.

10. She would rather have a BicMac than a salad. She would rather have a brownie than a piece of fruit. Shes my kinda Mama!

11. She is incredibly supportive of everything I want to do and strive after.

12. Not only is she supportive of me, but she is my biggest fan. She is so encouraging in all of my adventures, always telling me to do my best. And when my best isnt good enough, she still makes me feel like it was THEE best.

13. She is realistic and plans everything out with/for me. She knows going from point a to point b takes a lot of turns in betwee, so she makes all the necessary plans for it.

14. She has faith in me... probably more than I have in myself sometimes. But without her faith in me, I doubt I would shoot for my dreams the way I have.

15. She is mama bear when it comes to her kids... always willing to drop someone off the earth if we get hurt.

16. She understands me in a way nobody else does. Truly gets me.

17. She appreciates my humor and returns with her own witty remarks. Spending a day with my mom leaves my side hurting from laughing so much. Its amazing.

18. She is honest, yet respectful when giving advice. It may not always be what you want to hear, but its what you need to hear.

19. Shes always in my corner. Always lets me vent and will stand behind me, even help me fight my battles if not fight them for me.

20. Shes willing to drive to Riverside at the drop of a hat - it I say I need her, she will be on her way. Whether its because of a hard day or I forget something, she is more than willing to come to me if I ask.

21. She listens to me, and really hears what I have to say. She has never brushed me off or given me half an ear... She will stop what shes doing to hear what I have to say on any given day.

22. When she makes a commitment, she follows through with it. She remains committed and sees it to the end.

23. She appreciates the little things and remembers to be thankful for the smallest moments in life.

24. She makes signs to welcome me home and hangs them all over the house... theres no other house I would rather return to on breaks than this home.

25. She has dreams... Shes a visionary. Whether theyre about things she wants to accomplish being personal goals, or remodels on the house - she is able to see a finished product before it begins.

26. She went to dental hygien school to create a better life for her kids - us.

27. Shes opinionated and compassionate. Not many people can appreciate this.... but I can.... and those who really know me would understand why.

28. She shares in my opinions and ideas. This makes a lot of conversations go a lot more smoothly than if we disagreed.

29. Shes incredibly intelligent. I dont give her enough credit sometimes. She pulls things out of nowhere and I still dont know how she knows it.

30. Shes wise. She has learned from life experiences and has common knowledge and is willing to let people in on little "secrets". [I dont know if that makes sense at all, but it kinda does.]

31. Shes creative. Just look at the ideas she came up with for her and my sisters 3-day walk fundraising open house! Very creative!

32. She will laugh like Van and Cheyenne with me.

33. She loves animals. For years, she allowed MY dog to take over HER pillow at night.

34. She takes me to tea and talks in fun accents. Shes created a special tea time that I will never take for granted.

35. She obliges me in my love for green bean casserole and meatloaf... weird things like that.

36. She will go with me to run errands... even if its just returning the favor, I still appreciate it.

37. She sits outside with our sweet Sam while he eats nowadays - he wants company when he eats.

38. She persuades me to buy something we both like when Im on the fence about purchasing it... convincing me with anything that will get the price tag scanned and my card to come out.

39. She cheers, dances, and gets pumped with me at Padre games... shes a good buddy to take.

40. Which reminds me, shes got the best moves of any 50 year old I know!

41. She likes a lot of the same shows as me - including the horrible, "cryptic" (as she puts it), ridiculous ones.

42. She will sometimes send me a Starbucks card while Im at school if Im having a hard time or to aid in my coffee needs during finals.

43. She values time spent with loved ones and has taught me the importance of family.

44. We have similar tastes in things we like... it makes shopping kinda easy.

45. She is loyal to friends, family, or anything she commits to. She has attended the same church for years upon years... even with its frustrations, she still does love it.

46. She isnt afraid to laugh out loud or tell someone they need to pick up their dogs poop at the park.

47. She moves me into school and organizes all my stuff... cuz she knows it probably wont get done any other way...

48. She embraces my friends as her own when they come into our home or casually sees them around.

49. She tries new things and refuses to give up. One of my favorite examples is how she has planted several pretty flowers around the yard, waters them, and keeps them alive... given, this house does not have a good track record with greenery so her trying is inspiring!

50! She is EXCITED to be 50! Nobody is excited to get older, but she has embraced it and is choosing to enjoy it!

I love you with all my heart Mom! You are my hero! They say if you love something to set it free, if it stays and says 'lets order a pizza' then thats me! Ill be your buddy for life! Thank you for being the best Mom a girl could ask for! (That could be 51.) Love you!

The Power of a Bee

Today, I celebrated the Fourth of July by working, swimming, soaking in the sun, grilling/eating, hanging with family, and watching fireworks. I love fireworks. They bring me such intrigue and excitement. I really cant explain my interest in fireworks, but I feel it is a common American love.... and I came to this conclusion as we passed many many people sitting on the side of the road, in anticipation for the firework show. This is a day where people - common people, average Joes - can come together to celebrate the many years this country has been standing. A day where people can be thankful for the men and women who fight for our freedom on a daily basis, including those who have lost their lives protecting our privileges, which many people have come to believe are rights. A day to share in something we all have in common - being American citizens, being patriotic. I could go on and on. I never cease to realize how blessed I am to live in a country where I can have opinions and share them, can go to church and not be tortured.... the list goes on. But I will digress... and move on. Not because I think this country and the men and women in uniform arent worth it, but because I am passionate about the topic and often get carried overboard. And we never know where that could lead...

As I lazily floated around the pool this afternoon, I encountered several bees. Or maybe they were all the same bee. Unfortunately, I am no bee guru and therefore cant tell them from one another. Anyways. Thats besides the point. Each time, my reflexes worked quicker than my brain. I flinched, I slightly screamed, I splashed - I did whatever I had to to save myself. I mean. Those things sting you. It may sound silly, but the insects/bugs/whatever that people are most afraid of are spiders and wasps/bees. [I may have made that up on the spot, but its not like it doesnt sound believable!]

I am the person who probably possibly causes bees to sting. Thats disputable, but Ive been told I show symptoms of someone who is "asking" for a bee to sting them. Similar to encountering a lion or bear, how you are supposed to be still and not move a lot to aggravate or excite the animal to attack, it has been said that you are supposed to remain still to not anger the bee. And if need be - assume the fetal position. I dont totally know about the first part, but every time I am in the company of others and a bee approaches me and I run away, flailing my arms amd screaming in paranoia, I am told to remain calm and refrain from making sudden movements. Not that I see the bee going after that person! No! Its coming after me. Try to remain calm when its staring you straight in the eye, taunting you with its little stinger.

As I had a few close calls with Mr Bee today (probably Mr Bee, Bee Jr, and Baby Bee or something) I began to realize something. Bees are one of the smaller bugs in the bug family, yet they hold a lot of power. People are often swatting at them when they buzz near them. Why? Not like a fly where they are just plain annoying, they have an ability to hurt you. In some cases of people being allergic, they have the potential to kill. Ill ask this question only once - why wouldnt you swat away a bee knowing that??? Buncha crazies out there. Back to my realization. They really do hold a lot of power. As humans, we are capable of committing horrible crimes against humanity (just watch Criminal Minds or something if you dont believe me). We are powerful beings. Yet we can be overpowered by something small like a bee. An insufficient bee. [Although, for those of you who have seen Bee Movie, you will remember that bees are not insufficient.... in fact, they contribute a lot to our society with their pollination patterns. If all the bees in the world were to suddenly die, flowers would cease to exist. Dont believe me? Watch Bee Movie. And of course, I believe everything I watch - especially animated movies.]

This post may seem extreme in thought, as in "Carly that is a little crazy (extreme) to give bees that much power." But think about it. Bees DO possess a lot of power. Of course, humans are typically the ones who give it to them, but still. I think you now understand my thought here.

Things you never dared to consider....
until you opened a page to my blog....

My Point?.... None.

Just to share - theres not much purpose to this blog, other than to provide a read for my small following... cuz I know that you might come here to check if there are any new developments in Carlys life and continuously find yourself disappointed when the last posting is still from 3 or more weeks ago. But maybe itll be a little entertaining for you to read until something worthwhile to report comes to mind.

Well Ive now been on summer for a few weeks. It has consisted of working, hanging with my injured mother (who cant work), relaxing, hanging with friends... the typical summer stuff, so far. It has been lovely. Simply lovely. I know itll get crazier soon, but for now, Im grateful for this time.

Because of my recent decision to commit to my life backup plan, I decided I need to get back in shape. Understand, I have not been in top shape since my water polo days in high school... three years ago. Yup. Ive become lazy. Accustomed to college life of getting to do whatever I wanted. No pressure to work out to be in shape for a sport - no need. And since school seems to take over my life like ivy on a house, exercising kinda falls to the end of my to-do list. But I found free workouts on ondemand and decided it would be worth a shot to try out. Yesterday, I decided today would be the day to begin that horrible adventure in exerciseland.

I was so excited when I woke up this morning because I remembered there was an all-day Criminal Minds marathon on A&E today! I guess it was their way of celebrating Memorial Day? I would suggest a marathon of The Unit, but thats just my opinion. I didnt complain - I love Criminal Minds. I walked out to the bonus room to find my parents had already turned the tv to that channel. It was gonna be a good day, at least while I was home before work. But after a few episodes, I remembered my promise to myself to do an exercise video. Ive done a few before - they provide quite a workout! So I tore myself away from Criminal Minds for a bit and searched through my options of 100 or so and settled on a Jillian Michaels 58 minute workout.

I was barely 5 minutes into it and I was regretting this selection, let me tell you! She is one tough instructor. But I was feelin it! Needless to say, I stopped 17 or 18 minutes into it because I was so shaky and tired and sweaty. Pathetic right? I know. Its bad. After that, I did do a 10 minute ab workout... cuz I know theyre in there somewhere, begging to be worked. Im a tragedy. I know it. I have a long road ahead of me. But to get to where Im headed, I have no other choice. I think in the end Ill be grateful. But right now, Im walking a little funny cuz Im a little sore and Im definitely feeling the effects of the short amount I did. I will do the full 58 minute workout with Jillian without stopping! But that day is not today... and probably wont come this week either. But at some point it will. I know it will! After all, if Im gonna be running 3 miles a day at some point, this cant be as difficult as it is now.

I kinda found myself laughing throughout the day at myself. My entire major is concentrated on convincing people that exercise is important throughout a lifetime. It helps a person be healthier - improves their cardiorespiratory strength, overall endurance, muscle mass, on and on and on. Im tested on these things - I have to know all of this. And yet I make a decision to NOT work out each day. And as I sit with sore legs, Im reminded why I make that decision. Then I work out and I think Im stupid for making that decision. Its just a tangled web I keep weaving myself!

Well. Thats pretty much all I got. Just an unfortunate "workout session." If I can even call it that. And now, I shall return to my Criminal Minds. I think Im picking up on things... this is good for my future! I dont want to live in Quantico, but never know what agencies are hidden here in San Diego. ;)

Casey May

Ive been avoiding and waiting to write this blog for a while now, but at the same time Ive been wanting to write it. Avoiding because I know its going to be difficult; waiting because I need to become a little stronger before sharing about it; wanting because it is important to me and deserves a memory... or rather, she.

On April 23, we made a very difficult decision, as a family. We said goodbye to my sweet Casey May.
Casey was my yellow lab. Was was 13 years old, though according to a chart at the vet, she was about 102. She was my baby. I chose her out of a litter of many. She was my little buddy, my play mate, my partner in crime. She chased me around the house, took naps on my bed, hung out with me... She was the sweetest dog and the happiest. Everyone who met Casey instantly fell in love with her.

She underwent several surgeries, including two torn cruciates (in human terms - ACL... although I dont know if it was her anterior or posterior or what but now you understand the pain that is involved in that type of injury). Shes had arthritis since she was two years old, and it only spread and became more painful as she got older. Shes had numerous strange injuries that werent always the easiest to figure out (yes, she most certainly was mine). But despite all the pain she suffered through in her life, she never lost her smile. She never complained. She always made sure she was with you - even if it was difficult to get up and move to be with you.

She was so intelligent. Like smarter than us sometimes. She knew not to go swimming if she wanted to come in the house. She knew how to bring a bowl in the kitchen when she was done with it. She knew how to look pitiful, to get what she wanted. She knew how to find any - any - pill we tried to give her... and she knew how to work up a pill that was at the back of her throat. Yes, she was a brat. But her stubborness made her one of the girls in this family...

She was, in some aspects, the core of the family. If you found Casey, you found everyone else cuz she would be in the middle. Shes more than half my age so Ive known her for more than half my life. Shes brought us so many laughs, so much love, so much protection. She was also Sammys best friend. He always followed Caseys lead. She barked - he barked. She ate - he ate. She went outside - he went outside. This has been hard on him, but hes hanging in there. One of the sweetest, yet saddest things is that he has taken on some of her characteristics. I love him for it.

Apparently, Im not as strong as I thought I would be writing this. She was my baby... an amazing dog. I miss her so much. I miss her bark, and how excited she would get when we praised her for it. I miss how her whole body would shake when she would wag her tail. I miss her greeting me everytime I walked in the door. I even miss how she would get up and move away from me when I would love on her - because she liked to be with people, but needed her space at the same time. She was my best buddy. She got me through a lot - I could always count on her to provide a smile. Losing an animal is one of the hardest things to experience, but I wouldnt give up the time I spent with Casey for anything.

"Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened."

It Would Happen to Me...

I have 5 days of classes and finals left to go. And in the midst of that, I get to go home for Easter break. I really cant describe how excited I am for this Easter break, and especially summer. I love home. Plain and simple. But Easter is special to my family. Well, Easter and Christmas. Two of the most important "holydays" for Christians. Speaking for my family, we didnt always get to spend those days together, so each one we have together now means so much more. I think Easter might be a little different this year... But this year seems to have a lot of things going on around it. As long as were all together, I am ultimately ok with that. Then summer. Well. Its summer. And I get to go home. Nuf said.

But until those days of bliss occur, I am stuck in smoggy Riverside, studying my little tush off. Not actually... I wish. On Friday night I decided to hang out with a good friend before embarking on my weekend long homework/studying extravaganza. We went to the plaza (a place with a few shops and food places) to grab food, then we were going to watch a movie. Well. It was Friday night. At the Plaza. Therefore, the crazies were out. And this is where the story begins.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you are basically wearing pajamas, or sweats, no makeup, probably needing a shower, hair in every direction, and decide to run to the store - hoping to not run into anyone you know? But not only do you run into a ton of people you know, but upon a speedy get-away down an aisle with your cart, you run into a stand holding kleenex or trip over the wheel of the cart. Well. Maybe this example isnt quite a comparison to my story, but now youre on my page.

So, Kaihla and I head to the plaza, pull in, and begin searching for a parking spot. Let me assure you, it was crazy. And every person we came across very clearly did not know which way was left. It was one of those "WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR LICENSE?!" moments. It was also a moment of desiring for a cop, who could direct people a little better. The story is a little long, but in short, someone almost hit me, someone else stole my spot I had been waiting for, and we almost witnessed an accident by a car backing into another car. It couldve been a movie. I was wishing I had my moms car so I could be a bully to all these little cars who were bullying me.

At one point, I wanted to turn down an aisle, but couldnt see around a huge massive truck who didnt pull in its spot completely. And the cars were not about to wait for me to turn down it. So after 7 or more cars went by me, I decided to go - knowing someone would have to wait for me. One of those "someones just gonna get mad at me and theyre gonna have to deal with it - Im mad too" moments. So I turn...

And theres, of course, the biggest truck waiting to go by me. So Im saying to myself and Kaihla "hes gonna have to wait..." as Im squeezing by. But I couldnt totally fit. And as I look at the guy whos driving the big truck, I recognized him. Great. He waved me forward, kinda laughing and finally - finally - I got out of there. (Well then we went around and found a spot finally.) But as we pass him, both Kaihla and I are like "he goes to CBU!" Then I realized he not only goes to Cal Baptist, but hes in one of my classes. Faaantastic. And seriously this WOULD happen to ME. So were laughing, cuz what else could we do at that point?

But I felt bad and Im thinking I have to see that guy on Tuesday. And this isnt one of my huge classes, where the professor lectures and everyone sits and listens and doesnt interact. No, this is a small, interactive class, with one of my favorite professors. I talk all the time in this class. And if I dont speak up, my professor will call me by name and ask what I think. Ya. Its like if he ignored class one day, chances are high he didnt the next...

So I decided to find him through facebook, which was easy, and I emailed him. Like I said, I have class with him. Luckily were almost done, but I still would rather him not refer to me as the stupid driver or whatever. So I email him beginning with "this is super duper incredibly random, I know, but Im in your blah blah blah class and slightly cut you off/pulled in front of you on Friday...." And it went on from there. I assured him I really wasnt a bad driver but that I was frustrated and HAD to go at some point. And like I mentioned, I had class with him... so I wanted to apologize before class on Tuesday.

He responded. Obviously hes really nice. But he says "dont worry, you definitely are not the worst drive Ive ever seen.... I work on an ambulance and I see a lot." Oh great. I guess I should feel better? I promised him I always pull over for ambulances with their lights on. I think he appreciated it.

But theres my story. I know some of my blog readers like my stories like this.... where I do something insane. You just never know when youre going to run into someone you know... but not only that, you just never know when youre gonna do something ridiculous to a person youre fairly familiar with, if not see on a regular basis. Im not saying I was wrong in my actions - Im firm to stand that I didnt have much of another choice. But anyways, I think everyones been in those situations.... and they arent fun. But of course, it would happen to me....

Cancelled Class and a Sweatshirt

Two blogs in a week! How lucky are you?!

Well its only Wednesday, and yet I feel as if it should be Friday. The last weeks of school always seem to be the longest. I feel as if this semester has flown by, which is never a bad thing. But now time has to make up for itself, so everything has to slow down. The past 3 days have been bru-tal-ly long. Ridiculous is really what it is. And on top of that - school is coming to an end, so my brain is on summer mode. My mind is thinking about the things I need to do over summer and things I need to do to prepare for the summer. What needs to be completed now is just painful to do. I am having the most difficult time making it a priority. And in the midst of that is just dealing with daily life... which is never a dance in a prairie field for me. Ill spare you all those details, though.

Like I said, its only Wednesday - luckily Wednesday is almost over. Monday is my longest day and it proved to hold up its promise. Tuesday was just as long, filled with errands and homework in the middle of classes. Tuesday I woke up in a funk. I had to finish a paper that was due that day and had been really struggling with where I was going with it. Ya, Im a Kines major, I dont write papers. I finished it, but it was pretty tough. Took a shower and began to get ready for my day. It was one of those days where you just dont feel like getting ready and everything. You just want to crawl back in bed and not face the world. One of those you dont feel like anything looks right and nothing is making you feel better, so you would just rather not. And, of course, the sun was shining brightly and the air was warm, ruining my longing for a sweatshirt. I finally decided on clothes, ignored the possibility of makeup and making my hair controlled, and was ready to head out the door with my roommate around 10:45.

The whole walk to class, I complained about having to go and how I would have missed class today if it werent for my roommate. She didnt make me go, but I enjoy having the class with her, so I would rather go and have fun. I just was not feelin class. I wasnt feelin my outfit. I wasnt feelin the day, at all. We arrived at the room and found our seats. Strangely enough, our professor was nowhere to be found - which is abnormal. I ran out to talk to another professor, whos office is in the building. My conversation with him was to be about various opportunities for veterinary hours. I was trying to schedule a visit to a ranch of a woman who works at the school and has a lot of other veterinary connections she wants to share with us. Halfway through talking to him, I felt the need to check on my class. I opened the door to an empty classroom and my roommate waiting for me, notifying me class had been cancelled. Apparently, all of us smart collegiates had missed the sign on the door saying class was cancelled. Praise. The. Lord. I finished my conversation with my professor, then headed back to the apartment.

As I walked, I started laughing. I had been complaining, wanting class to be cancelled.... and long behold, God answered my prayers. I got back to my apartment. Since we had time, Cayla and I went out on the front lawn to soak in some Vitamin D. Then we ate. Then I went to class. Then I met with another friend to talk to the woman about a ranch visit. This conversation went AWESOME. Literally better than I could have ever wanted. We now have a plan to go to her ranch next Friday for a BBQ... and theres a possibility well go horseback riding!!!!!! Which is something Ive wanted to do for yeaaarrrsss. So stoked. And again, I found myself walking away, thanking the Lord for this amazing opportunity He has provided.

I texted a professor to let him know he should be excited to hear about the conversation we had! The rest of the day kinda went. Nothing to report. Just lab and such. Then this morning, I again, had a difficult time of waking up. When I finally convinced myself I needed to, I took off my mask to reveal a very dark room. I smiled in my head - physically smiling would have taken too much effort that early in the morning. I went to the bathroom and came out to see the weather. The sky was blanketed in a light grey color. My heart skipped a beat. I would be able to throw on a sweatshirt... my desire from yesterday.... the desire that had carried to today. I walked back to my room, threw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt and was ready for the day. Again, I found myself thanking the Lord for providing me with a day to wear a sweatshirt.

I embarked on my walk to class, sat through a boring lecture, then went to talk to the professor I had texted about the veterinary opportunities. He nearly jumped out of his chair, he was so excited to hear what we had to tell him. We ended up having an hour conversation with him. I gave him a hard time about not texting me back.... which he didnt realize he had even received a text... (that seemed insignificant.... but wait for it....) We went to our next class and, again, sat through a boring lecture. Halfway through the class I received a text.... from my professor, telling me I "owned this biochem lecture." Understand why hes my favorite professor?

Then I went to lunch with a good friend... Chipotle, nonetheless. Then had a random conversation with a guy in our class. The days have been a little random, but there have been interesting things in the midst of it all.

I found myself laughing the past few days, especially with my class being cancelled and todays weather. Im not saying I am the reason for those things to happen... but Id like to think so. Just kidding. But really, I was cracking up because I was complaining and just so over it all and here God comes with his great sense of humor. Kinda telling me stop your complaining, Ive got it. Telling me hes in control and that he will take care of me. Giving me reasons to praise Him, not that I should have to have specific reasons. But reminding me Hes GOT this. And I should just be trusting in Him with it all. This seems to be the consistent thing Hes been teaching me lately....

"Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun." - Psalm 37:4-6

Or if your dawn is a cloudy day.... like mine. =D

"Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”" - Psalm 91:1-2

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:4-6

This is the Stuff

Ive had a desire to blog for the past few days, but havent had any reason to (ie. I havent had any inspiration, no funny stories, no preponderances, (preponderances??? who am I???), etc..). So, I come to my blog to write something, my fingers hovering over the keys, waiting for some initiation from my brain... nothing. I wait. My fingers remain ready to type, ready to catch anything my mind thinks of.... nothing. Significant fail. So I decided I would post anyways, and force my fingers to type... even if my brain isnt on board with the documenting.

Luckily, you dont have to hear random babblings because finally, something came to me. Earlier this week, my good friends dog was attacked by another dog while out for a walk. Apparently, the attacking dog came tearing out of a house, through a door carelessly left open, and began attacking my friends dear dog. Little Cotton is so sweet that she didnt even defend herself, but she took it. Before you get sad, she is doing good. She had stitches and tubes to drain any fluid buildup on the top of her head, but she is doing really well. I met her for the first time last night and she is just one of the sweetest dogs Ive ever met - and I have met a LOT of dogs... Much like my dogs, she is a people dog, desiring to be pet and loved on.

It kinda hit me recently how inspiring this little girl is. My sweet girl inspires me, too, but thankfully my dogs have never been in a situation where they have been attacked like this. I thought of how often we get attacked, out of nowhere, by the unexpected. Throughout life, we encounter storms - some storms pass, some are harder than others, and some people live in a storm... basically, permanently. Sometimes, you can see the storms coming from a mile away and you have time to prepare for them. Sometimes, you barely have seconds before they attack you from all angles, with no way of escaping. Whats important is how you deal with it and how you recover from it. As Christians, we are blessed to know we have a mighty Savior to surrender to. Surrender our problems, our struggles, our storms. Speaking for myself, being a control-freak, this is probably the most difficult aspect of being a Christian. I want to fix everything myself and typically have an extremely difficult time surrendering everything. Though I will say that rarely do I roll over and take it, which in some cases may be the best thing to do. Anyways. Back to my point.

This blog wasnt necessarily aimed to be about me. It was aimed to be a generalization about how life not only knocks you down, but it attacks you, and how were expected to get back up, dust ourselves off, and keep trekking on. Little Cotton experienced one of the worst forms of attack - a physical attack. But she acts perfectly fine. If it werent for her little tubes and stitches, you wouldnt know she had been so maliciously attacked. Shes inspiring - her happy smile and innocent attitude, refusing to stay down.

(Though this blog wasnt supposed to be about me - heres the 'me' part...) I came home for the weekend, after a long week. Nothing particularly bad happened, it was just long and filled with tests and studying and dumb schoolwork. I needed a bit of a break, so naturally, I headed home. However, upon entering my room, I noticed I had mail on my bed. Not abnormal, but its contents werent of the typical ads and such. This contained a ticket, which I had received a few weeks ago... I know - tragic. Well, this ticket turned out to be way more than I had expected. I became discouraged. Thinking about having to pay the ticket, needing to work to pay off the ticket, as well as, needing money throughout the summer and next year. I need to take classes this summer. I need to get in more observation hours for grad school. Instantly, my mind was taken over with discouraging, frustrating, and stressful thoughts.

Then I thought of little Cotton and her smile, despite tubes, stitches, swelling, pain meds... I couldnt help but shake my head at myself. Trust in the Lord, I told myself. Earlier this week, my friend introduced me to a new song. It is so applicable to my life. And especially with the fact that I just got a ticket.... The song is by Francesca Battistelli, called "This is the Stuff."

"I lost my keys in the great unknown
And call me please 'Cuz I can't find my phone

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

45 in a 35
Sirens and fines while I'm running behind

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff
Someone save me
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
And I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use"

How awesome is that? It proved to be a friendly reminder as I listened to it, just last night. Ultimately, kinda random post... I know. But Ive finally blogged! And - to me - it was worthwhile to mention it all. Hopefully you got a little something out of it, even if it was knowing that you arent alone in your storms.